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Tales of the Deuce  
Written by Dawkus  
Thursday, 11 November 2004

    Happy Birthday Michael!!!!

     I started a yahoo groups called Blood N Guts so that my friends and I could have an easy way to mass email our friends when we were about to play Battlefield 1942: Desert Combat. My brother, being about as odd as I am, really got into his clan name, "ThunderDeuce." He has since retired the name and moved on, but I felt that some of his rather strange emails should see the light of day one more time. So here they, are, the "Tales of the Deuce!"  

Behold, true believers...Tales of the Deuce!From: "Big Mike"
Date: Sat Aug 28, 2004 9:15 pm
Subject: VERY URGENT (Well, kinda) ok...not really....

From now on, when ThunderDeuce enters the game, everyone must start chanting--"Deuce,Deuce,Deuce,". This must be done repeatedly by every member once I enter. Also, it is important that it be chanted every so often during the game too. Your cooperation will be noted.

-ThunderDeuce

 

From: "Michael"
Date: Tue Aug 31, 2004 4:26 pm
Subject: Desert Combat--UPDATE

There has been a few changes since the last message posted concerning ThunderDeuce. No longer is each member required to "chant" my name when I enter the game(Deuce, Deuce, Deuce). I was informed by my advisors that this may start other groups or clubs or even cults. Other members of BloodnGuts may want to take it upon
themselves to uplift me to "star" status or even send me fan mail. This shouldnt be. With that being said, It will NOW be required of each member to
simply say, "The Deuce has entered the building" when I enter the game. Also it will be required of each member to simply say, "The Deuce has left the building" when I exit each game. Your cooperation
will be noted.

 

All Deuce...All The Time...From: "Michael"
Date: Tue Aug 31, 2004 8:54 pm
Subject: -New Update concerning The Deuce-

Great news!! My advisors have informed me that a weekly newsletter to all the BloodNGuts members might help control the demand for ThunderDeuce. The Newsletter will be titled "The Deuce", and will be a tell all magazine about his private and public life. Also, I have agreed to publish ThunderDeuce's greatest victories.  I was reluctant at first to have ThunderDeuce exploited in such a way, but I can see that it is necessary. If you have any suggestions, please contact my staff.

 

The Brothers Holding the Line...From: "Michael"
Date: Wed Sep 1, 2004 7:32 pm
Subject: Tonight

     Concerning tonight, ThunderDeuce will be available. If I'm playing in the game I understand you may be compelled to bow to ThunderDeuce. It will be permitted.  I have decided to cancel tonights speeches at the TNC's (ThunderDeuce National Convention) in order to play. This has caused
more riots in NYC. I apologize and condemn the riots. My fans are just eager to hear ThunderDeuce speak. My vision for my people will exceed all expectation. I have a great staff and wonderful advisors with vision. Keep the faith. ThunderDeuce out.

Yo Mike...  Caught again?From: "Michael"
Date: Thu Sep 2, 2004 5:50 pm
Subject: About the new pic

     My advisors have informed me that there is a pic on the front of the BnG homepage. The pic is actually an imposter. My fan base is growing beyond projected studies, so there seems to be the need for
imposters posing as ThunderDeuce. Dont fret BnG members. Have resolve. This is only an attempt to bring ThunderDeuce down to regular status.
ThunderDeuce has turned this investigation over to the F<BS>I.  Their sources have informed my staff that whoever created this pic is the best The F<BS>I has ever seen. ThunderDeuce agrees. It took a clever, ingenious, and quite frankly, a professional to create such a wonderful portrait. ThunderDeuce is disturbed by the pic, but will
give respect and credit to its maker. It did indeed take a "great one" to devise such a photo. ThunderDeuce out.

 

From: "Michael"
Date: Sun Sep 5, 2004 7:41 pm
Subject: ThunderDeuce's Retirement???

ThunderDeuce's advisors and staff sat down and discussed the possibilities of ThunderDeuce's retirement. This grieved me at first, but I quickly understood they had good intentions. ThunderDeuce's fame and popularity are exploding out of control.  Dont fret. I have come to a conclusion that will deter ThunderDeuce from Retirement. I am asking every member of BloodnGuts to drastically improve their playing ability. By doing this ThunderDeuce might have incintive to continue playing. ThunderDeuce
Feeds on challenging games and skilled opponents while playing the DC mod. So far he has gone hungry. This shouldnt be. ThunderDeuce is
finished eating his pre-game meal of Chicken Mcnuggets and fries. His body is fed. His need for a challenging opponent will go unfed tonight*. How sad. ThunderDeuce out.

 

*(ThunderDeuce will neither confirm nor deny Thunderdeuce actually exsists while playing other members, since he gets the most kills and the others never see him during play.)

- The End

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